F E A R L E S S F R E E D O M || 8.25.15.

   It's been almost a year since my last post. A lot has happened. A lot has changed. I've gone through a season of waiting on God and learning to be attentive to him. Many times I've had a lot to talk about or share, but when I started this I told God this blog was his. My words aren't sufficient, they aren't enough, and my own words from my own thoughts don't always glorify God. It's easiest to talk about the pain when you're heavily weighed under it, but there isn't any glorification in that, there's no victory in pain. Victory isn't found in gossip or complaints, it's found by waiting on God, and sometimes it's only between you and Him.

  But let me tell you, victory is near, and freedom is truly freeing.

I always thought the battle I was facing I had given to the Lord, I really thought I had handed the reins of the issue to Him. Yep, so I thought. Five years, blinded, and blinded by myself. It was me who was fighting, and me who was worn. I claimed my rest was in the Lord and my heavy burdens belonged to Him, but when it came down to the nitty-gridy of not being in control, things weren't the same. You see, I tried to find my peace thinking God had it under control when really I was still holding on.

   Exodus 14:14 - "The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still."

This verse became my battle cry, and before long my victorious song. I reached a breaking point, a point where I came face to face with myself, I had to give it up, I had to give it to God. The Lord says to prove him faithful, so I did. I asked the Lord, "If your word is true, then Father God, fight for me because I can't fight for myself any longer."

V I C T O R Y  I S  F O U N D  I N  T H E  L O R D || F R E E D O M ' S  C A L L I N G

I let go, and when I did, God ran with it. For a month, He showed up is a different way than I could ever fathom. He showed me that he is so faithful, he fought, he won, and every battle I tried to win for myself in the past five years he completed in four weeks.

                                     H E  I S  F A I T H F U L

I finally felt release last night to share when I came across an accidental photo I took this summer. It should have got deleted, but somehow it didn't. It never meant anything to me until last night, and when I found it, a feeling of freedom overcame me. I was taken back, and God showed me, this is what I've done for you, freed you -- to live F R E E. Free from sin, free from distress, free from disappointment, free from sadness, free from lies, free from the opinion of man. He said, be free for me. Be ||F E A R L E S S|| in Christ Jesus.

 

No matter how high the waters, you can stand.

No matter what they say, you'll survive.

No matter the odds, you'll overcome.

No matter how defeated you feel, He is bigger.

No matter how dry the desert, His waters will quench the thirst.

No matter the storm, His peace calms.

My sister and I have a large age gap. And last night I realized God did it for such a time as this. She is my living example, everyday, to dance in the freedom of the Lord. Embrace it. Be vulnerable, love what God had given to you. Fearlessly trust in the Lord.  Hold on tight. Let the Lord who made you, fight for you, because you can't do it all on your own. Come unto the Father with a child's heart. Love him with all you have, in word and deed. 

So dance in the pool, sing a little louder in the car, add a skip to your walk even when it's raining, smile a little bigger, and pray a little harder. 

|| H E  H A S  M A D E  U S  F R E E ||

XoXo. Elizabeth

 

Buckle up, Buttercup.

   As a high school student I have the wonderful privilege to attend and take college classes. Now, I must admit, it isn't always a joy. I mean it is school, and it is challenging. Most weekends and weeks are spent writing essays and studying for what seems pointless, but I know in all reality, later on in life I will be thankful I'm getting some of these dreadful required classes out of the way.

   One of my classes that I'm taking is an 'Introduction to Psychology' class. Going into it, I was actually kind of excited because I like to analyze people. I am the type of person who is a definite observer and notice little things a lot of other people don't. Anyways, I was totally wrong about how this class was going to go. My first suggestion to anyone reading this is, don't set expectations on a class because you are likely to be really disappointed. Just kidding! Be excited!

   My class is fairly small, only about 10 students, but our professor is not so professor like. I mean to give you a better picture, just image Santa Clause trying to teach you a Psyc class.. oh and take it seriously, too.

   Everyday is an adventure and on one particular day the subject of the day was talking about ghosts, demons, and other stuff related among that. Of course being how it had to be, my professor decided to pick on me and get my opinion that day. So he asked, so I gave it. His response was strange declaring it's best to not believe in anything. And so, by the end of the class period his conclusion to believe in nothing, resulted in thinking that trapping me in a haunted house seemed best. Yes, that's correct. I said I didn't believe in ghosts, so the whole class made fun of me and thought it would be best to trap me in a haunted house so that I would conform. You should have seen my eye roll.

   The point here isn't that I was made fun of or any of that, it's simply this. You have to know where you stand and you have to do nothing but stand. You can't play the "I don't know" game and just think that's okay. All your life people will give you their opinions and what THEY think is best, but it's honestly not their opinions that count, or even matter. It's Gods. If you don't consider God's law first and where he stands and what HE says is right, then nothing matters.

   I have a lot of people that don't care for me, I don't have friends that I go and hang out with on the weekends, I offend people because I do what God tells me to do instead of what they tell me to do, and quite frankly I'm okay with it. I'm okay with it because I know that when I please God I am doing the right thing. I will not settle to please you, or any professor just because then that way it won't be difficult. I am only 16, and I have had to deal with a lot more than I should at my age. People always tell me that I'm just a kid and to go and have fun and not worry about the rest. Now while that sounds nice and it's true I'm young, but that just simply isn't how it works. Why? Because my generation is a generation that is going down the sewer system fast and someone has to do something. Someone has to care, and someone has to grow up and be real. So when a professor or someone I know gets mad at me because I am choosing to do what God tells me to do, good. My opinion is God's opinion and if you have an issue with it, deal with it.
 
   I used to really struggle with what people thought about me. Growing up where I have and with the kids I have, hasn't been easy, because I haven't done things like them. There is a label that gets put on people who don't conform or do something how the status-quo says to do it. It's hard to trust God sometimes doing something everyone says is wrong. It makes you question what you're doing, it makes you want to stop how God said to do it and do it their way so that the gossip going around will stop. It's painful and it's testing. But let me tell you something, when you can't understand and see the whole picture, God can, and you just need to hold on and trust. When God speaks, don't doubt.

   God showed me something one day while I was riding along in the car. I was dealing with some stuff and feeling really down and questioning God about things I knew he told me but was doubting because people were giving me hardship about it. We were on the Interstate and there was cars zooming all around us. While I was looking ahead in front of us, alongside at the same time, two huge semi's cornered us in. My instant reaction was fear filling me inside because I felt like we were being pulled backwards and crushed by these two large trucks that were triple the size of us. As I started to focus on the feeling of fear, all of the sudden it was like reality was quiet for a second and God refocused my focus and vision to straight in front of us. In that second I couldn't see the trucks that were trying to pull me down and destroy me, the things that were causing me doubt were gone and all I could see was the clear path ahead. God showed me two things that day. He showed me that the doubt was not from him because my God is not a God of doubt or confusion, what he says is true. When those huge trucks were passing by they symbolized the people that were giving me trouble and that even though it seems like they are winning and destroying me, creating doubt, that I was not to focus on that but focus on the path ahead of me that He has laid out before me. The other thing he showed me using those semi's was that he is surrounding me like he says in his word, he is covering me with his wings of refuge and in his hands I am held. NO harm is allowed to befall on my dwelling. He not only revealed something significant to me in that moment but corrected me for doubting him. I was instructed by him and his word to stand tall on the promises of his written and spoken word.

   Knowing where you stand and being confident in God is important. Walking blindly will destroy you. People will eat you alive if you don't know where you stand on the word of God. When He instructs you, listen and don't doubt. If you live for the approval and acceptance of man, trying to please everyone, then you will be destroyed and die from their rejection. You're either standing firm on God's word or you're not. People won't approve and they won't understand you're walk and journey with God, and that is okay. It's okay because it's always better for God to be pleased then for men to applaud you. I strive to hear, "Well done my good and faithful servant," from my God rather than from any man.

   SO, Mr. Psychology teacher, go ahead and trap me in a haunted house, but just know that when you come to let me out you will fall to your knees in repentance because the King of Kings will be standing by my side.

 

As Always,

XoXo. Elizabeth

 


 

Good Enough for Who?

     You know when God is pressing something on you to write but you just don't know what it is? Well, that has been my case for the past few months. You know it is there, but can't put into words what it is. Yea, defiantly me. It can be frustrating.

These past few months have been nothing but busy. I have wanted to sit down and write something that isn't required of me, you know like something I enjoy unlike another essay or something. Trying to find the time has just almost seemed impossible and then when I do have time to sit down and write, I just stare at the screen not being able to comprehend what God's trying to work through me.

WELL, let me tell you. I finally got it. In the most unexpected time, probably because I wasn't searching for it so hard trying to come up with it. And now that he did, it makes so much sense, because it's really what has been rolling around in me and what God has allowed my eyes to observe. I just haven't realized it.

I was watching a movie and there was particular part of a dialogue that just struck me, I was captivated in an inexpiable way. It went a little something like this:

    "No matter how hard you try, you've convinced yourself that you are not good enough. But good enough for who? Who are you not good enough for? It's YOU. You have convinced yourself that YOU aren't good enough for YOU..."

I mean lets be honest with ourselves, how often do you walk by the mirror each day or maybe look at your kids and tell yourselves repeatedly that YOU aren't good enough? Moms, how many times do you look at another and think how they must have it all together because her kids aren't fighting and screaming and she doesn't look like she just lost world war 3? Or dads, how many times do you look at another father and beat yourself because you're convinced he's a better provider than you? Or teenagers, especially the girls my age, how many times do you look at someone else and do nothing but compare yourselves? You convince yourself you're ugly and fat because that girl is skinnier and prettier.

It is a continuous cycle that leaves us all in despair. We end up farther back than when we started and our reality can never meet our expectations. We fall away from who God created us to be because we start to do nothing but try and accomplish God's purpose for some other person rather than ourselves. You can't fulfill the role of an eye surgeon if you're a teacher, it just doesn't work that way. Someone who would try and do that we would all look at them as if they were insane, but in a different sense, that is what we do. We try to be everyone but ourselves.

Everyone has failures, everyone screws up and makes mistakes, and the truth is that you will have failure moments and you WILL mess up, but it's your choice to be happy and to continue on despite of it. It's your choice to look up and give praise to the one who paid your debt and raised your life from the dead. It's not by your doing that you can continue on and it's not by your doing that you can keep going each day, but it is by the grace of God. It's by his grace that you can keep going each day and not make the same mistakes, it's by his grace that you are made new to never make that mistake again.

It's hard to be vulnerable, it's hard to not put up a front that you have it all together. It's hard to be honest with yourself and how you come off to others. But something I have learned is that my scars tell a story, and it is nothing to be ashamed of. It's nothing to hide and denying the truth only hurts you worse. Those scars are a reminder to me of times when life tried to break me, but failed. They are markings of where the structure of my character was being welded.

I look at the way God created a bird to care for it's baby and how that momma bird does nothing but go to every extreme to just care for that baby and do it's job the way it was created to. It compares itself to no other bird, it doesn't try to be better or be the best, it just does it's job and is content with it. It's a beautiful thing to watch it just do what is it, and that's enough. We all spend so much time beating ourselves up trying to be anything and everything that we aren't to try and find acceptance when we all ready have got it. God's word says he doesn't make mistakes, so why do we look in the mirror daily and tell him that making us was a mistake? Why do we tell him that the job he has given us was a mistake because we think we can't do it?

The truth is: We are all a bunch of different looking sinners in need of the same looking cross. We are unique individuals created by God himself in need of the same grace to be who he has individually made us to be. In order to fulfill his purpose for your life you have got to stop living for other people and yourself and start living for God only. It's only by him that our imperfections are made perfect. We are a beautiful, chaotic mess. I'm not you, and you aren't me, but you are his masterpiece, and that is enough.

It is only in God that we discover our origin, our identity, our meaning, our purpose, our significance, and our destiny. It's only in him that we will ever be enough.

I'm a failure but,
He's my forgiver.
I'm a sinner,
But he is my savior.
I'm broken but,
He's my healer.
I'm his child,
And He is my God.

I am enough. YOU are enough.

As Always,
  XoXo. Elizabeth.
     

   
 

Summer Seasons.

   Summer in my life has officially came to an end, and to be honest I am really okay with that. I have come to the conclusion that you either have a great summer or a summer that is really not all that fantastic, and this year mine was one of those "not so fantastic" summers.

I really didn't do much, I didn't hang out with alot of people, I didn't do what people call "normal" for teenagers to do in the summer.Were there fun moments, well of course, but was in the best summer of my life, no.

It might even sound silly, but as I am looking back on it I have come to a place where I am actually thankful for it. I am thankful that my summer wasn't big and grand, I am thankful that I had to go through some stuff, and I am thankful for what I have overcome this summer and what I've learned.

It was rough, it was hard. I often felt very alone and that I had no one and nothing to do, but it was okay and it was necessary because I learned new things and walked with God to higher places. I have learned how I will never treat someone, I have learned how to be content in every season, I have learned how to be joyful despite how I feel at the moment. I have learned that its okay to go through things and it's okay to be okay. This summer I have overcome, I have let God mold my heart to how he wants it. Allowing him to do that, allowing him to root out things, readjust, sometimes it can hurt, but there is no greater reward then knowing that God is having his way in YOU.

I am not perfect, by any means. I have a long way to go, I have more areas to mature and grow in, but why I am thankful for this summer is because at the end of each day God showed me he was there. He showed me so many things and I don't deserve to see them, I don't deserve to see his beauty, yet he opens my eyes to see it.

Its amazing how when you open yourself up to Him to show you things and speak to you, he really does. So many of us go each day and don't even notice the beauty of a sunset, because we are to distracted with meaningless things. God is in that sunset, he MADE that sunset, his beauty is worth more then rubies or diamonds. I used to never think much of something like a sunset, but through this summer God has showed me and reminded me through a sunset that at the end of each day, NO matter what, he still remains the same, and he IS faithful.

This summer God gave me a new thankfulness and new appreciation for the people who surround me and uplift me. I may not have alot of people in my life but I have who God gave me and I am thankful, I am blessed. He has opened my eyes to see his love through these people, he has given and provided for me through these people in amounts and measures of love that my brain can't even handle. All I know is my heart wants to explode because is all I can feel is God's love and joy bubble up.

My 16yr old advice I have to give at the end of this blog is simply this:
- When you have a relationship with Christ, a real relationship with him, it's not all sunshine and rainbows. It just isn't. You go through seasons, you fight battles, you get a little dirty, but one thing I can stand and shout from the rooftops because I know its true is this, he IS FAITHFUL and he WILL bring you through. The victory has already been won, its already yours, now fight for it. Seasons come and go, and things shift. Don't loose your joy and never forget who your fighting for and that it is worth it, because he fought for you, he DIED for you, and he didn't even have too.

My heart is FULL.
I am THANKFUL.
I am BLESSED.

     As always, XoXo.
        -Elizabeth.

61 Years.

Their journey started 61 years ago today on a Saturday morning in a little church. Bright and early they were up, had a ceremony and a brunch after at the wedding in a little home. Simple and easy. Not overdone, no extra things, just straight to the point because the ceremony and the decor didn't determine their love or how long they would be together. Their story and their love was founded upon God, and quitting wasn't an option. When the going got tough, the tough got going and staying married was the only option.

Exactly 9 months later they had their first baby. And in the next 15 years had 10 more. Eleven kids in fifteen years and to this day she swears she never had two in diapers at the same time. Raised them all on the family farm, and poured their hearts into it. Everything was done by hand, meals made from scratch, hanging laundry on the line. You had to wind up that phone to call someone, it wasn't just done by the click of a button. The windows were rolled down by a crank, and the pictures were nothing but black and white.
Things were hard, you had to work hard. Things weren't just handed to you and the time you put in is what you got back.

They followed the word of God and the fruit of their labor has brought nothing but blessing and an overabundance of joy. 37 grandchildren and 9 great grandchildren to be exact. They bring joy everywhere they go and set an example day to day to not only me, but to everyone who knows them.

I have never once in all my 16 years have ever seen a shortage of goodies. Cookies, ice cream, malts, pies, cakes, ice cream desserts, and any other type of  baked good you bet it is there. The motherly example she has set is mind blowing, she inspires me. She didn't teach how to be rich. She taught how to be happy so that her offspring would know the value of things, not the price. Her heart is giving and kind. She leaves no one behind. She is the ultimate supporter, she will always be your biggest fan. The bed is always made, laundry is put away, and the house is clean. She puts her body to work, she is diligent and strong. She rises early in the morning and puts her shoes on and takes on the day, you would never know she is 82.

His hands are beaten and rough, they've put in more than their time. Served in the military and has seen pain, destruction, and brokenness. He provided for a family of 12 and settled for nothing less. He put in hard work and was a loving father. He is quiet but never outspoken. His words are full of knowledge and wisdom. When he speaks you listen. His heart is dedicated, his heart is tender. Family, card clubs, and golf are just a few of his favorites. He still goes out to the farm everyday, you would never know he is 86.

Just like all marriages have their ups and downs, the difference was they woke up every morning and despite what was happening around them they still fell in love again. As I get older and I start to walk my journey I look to you, I admire you, and I respect you. How blessed am I to be able to say I have someone as special as you to look too. Thank you for pushing through, thank you for never quitting and thank you for setting an example for me that I can follow. I am inspired and I am honored to say I am your granddaughter.

Gram and Gramps, my hat is off to you, because not many people can say this but, happy 61st Anniversary.

 

As always, Xoxo.

Elizabeth.

Little beauty. Little inspiration.

 

"She's a dreamer and a doer..

 

.. A thinker and one who see's possibility everywhere.. 

 

...She finds her beauty from within...

 

...So as she pulled back her hair, she set her sights on God, and vowed to finish her race in victory.." 

My little bug you inspire me. 

As always, Xoxo.

Elizabeth.

Snow and Snowman's.

Usually as an Iowan it's normal to expect cold winters and the occasional drastic temperature changes during those winter days. Notice I said, "occasional".. Yeah, well not this year. "Occasional" temperature changes isn't the word for it, I would say not even close. Here in Iowa, this 2013-2014 winter has been anything but a breeze. No exaggeration. One day it is snowing and the next it is a high of 77 and sunny. One day I am layered in clothing trying to do anything and everything to not let the cold touch my skin and the next I am out in shorts and a tank getting turned a nice golden-brown with a tint of sunburn. Talk about your wardrobe being extremely confused. No trying to plan ahead here!

I do admit though, the snow made my fence look pretty.. so of course the natural response to that was to take a completely necessary picture.

Snow can be a lot of fun too I guess, I mean hey, "Do YOU wanna build a snowman?.."

 

( Notice her eyes closed. This is her new way of thinking picture taking is done. And I guess the sun might have played a role as well =] ) 

 

I'd have to say that you are never to old to get out and play in the snow. Nerveless build a snowman. Always have dreams and always set goals but never forget that during the midst of all the chaos and crazy that there is this thing called life that your living and it's okay to sometimes just sit back and enjoy. Because at the end of the day, at the end of your life, you won't remember the chaos and mess, you'll remember all the time you threw away from being caught up in the nonsense that doesn't really matter. It's okay to live life, it's okay to enjoy. I think about my little sister. She is 4 and I'm 16. I'm gone in 2 years and I often wonder if she will remember me being here, growing up with me around. To me each moment I have left with her matters.. it counts. Make every moment you have with the ones you love count. Because once it's gone, it's gone.